What does Christmas really need to look like in a fostering home? In this special bonus episode, we explore how the pressure for festive perfection can collide with the need for safety, regulation, and connection – especially for children in care. Rather than offering a one-size-fits-all approach, this conversation invites carers to pause, reflect, and rethink what “magic” might actually mean.
Christmas is often described as a feast for the senses – lights, music, food, and constant activity. But what happens when that sensory “magic” becomes too much?
In the episode, I'm joined by Cíara Farrell who reflects on how everyday festive details – from flashing lights to familiar seasonal smells – can land very differently for a child who has experienced trauma. It raises an important question for carers: how do we notice what a child’s nervous system might be telling us, even when everything looks fine on the surface?
Many carers feel an understandable pull to make Christmas extra – more presents, more activities, more excitement. But is more always better?
Cíara invites us to consider a quieter approach. What if the most meaningful moments aren’t the big gestures, but the small signs that a child was truly “held in mind”? The episode also explores how new traditions can emerge naturally – especially when cultures, histories, and expectations differ around the table.
Festive events don’t just happen in the moment – they have a build-up and an aftermath too. But how often do we plan for all three?
In this conversation, Cíara talks through a simple framework carers can use to think ahead, stay attuned during busy moments, and support children once the excitement has passed. It’s less about rigid plans – and more about noticing what helps everyone stay regulated and connected.
The smallest little thing that shows a child that you held them in mind and that you thought about the things that they like and the things that are important to them… can really be the thing to help build that connection.
At its core, this episode isn’t about doing Christmas “right”. It’s about asking kinder questions – of ourselves, of our expectations, and of the season itself.
What if the real magic isn’t found in the schedule or the shopping list, but in the steady work of building trust, safety, and relationship – one thoughtful choice at a time?
Listen to the full episode below, or on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
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→ Learn more about the supports Origins provides every foster carer
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→ Join one of our upcoming online Fostering Info Sessions
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